The Twilight Zone of May 2013

So I’m not sure exactly what happened…well, I have a pretty good idea…but we entered the Twilight Zone along about the 1st of May and have just now emerged on the other side.

In a galaxy far, far away…

Cue the weird music…doo-do-do-do…doo-do-do-do…

I’m not flippin’ kidding you.

I was going along minding my own business, watching the little blades of green grass slowly start reaching for the springtime sun, thanking the Universe for every raindrop that was falling..and sometimes the snowflakes, but I digress…

And whammo!   Just like that, I got knocked into June.  Well, almost June.  For all intents and purposes June.

Whatever.

The husband brought home some zombie virus that pretty much wiped out life as we knew it here.  He ended up in the Steamboat Springs ER one Saturday night with pneumonia.  (Not to toot my own doctor-type horn, but by Friday afternoon I was talking pneumonia and getting pretty concerned, and finally got some agreement that maybe there should be a trip to see a bona-fide PEOPLE doctor…as I don’t really count you know…only being licensed to work on EVERY other species but homo sapiens.  But again, I digress.)

Then the munch-i-kin and I succumbed to the zombie virus.  And all h*e*double toothpicks broke loose.

All this was going down in the days leading up to the annual Dance Recital in Laramie.  That we have spent umpteen bazillion dollars on for the last year…between gorgeous costumes and monthly lessons and yada, yada, yada.  Now both the dancer and the dancer’s mom were too feverish and sick to even think about trekking over the mountain to rehearsals.  Needless to say the dancer’s mom was NOT a happy dancer’s mom.  Not in the least bit.

Somehow, the fevers left us two days before the big day and the ADORABLE little dancer felt well enough to tap onto the stage and NAIL her dance!!!  Woo hoo hoo hoo hooo!!!!  She was phenomenal!  I am so proud of my little dancer…what a  cutie!  If I could I’d post a pic or two to show you, but I’ve been banned from doing so.  (Bad internet-abusing people out there who snatch little kids’ pictures and do bad things with them…lovely world we live in, eh?)

Anyway, we managed to tap and ballet our way through those days, interspersed with numerous showings of Episodes 4, 5 and 6 of the Star Wars world…the ORIGINAL, theatrical versions thank you very much.  Blessedly, the 6 year old I live with is in agreement with me that Han shoots first.  Period.  No questions asked.  And the doctored Special Edition that George tried to pass over on us is really pathetic.  And anyone worth anything knows this.  She can pick out all the things that really shouldn’t be there (like Jabba the Hutt outside the Millenium Falcon, Greedo shooting first, the funkier funky creatures in the bar)…I’m telling you what.  If the month of May was good for anything, now I have a die-hard Star Wars fan to commune with.

Nirvana.

So, also too, the hummingbirds arrived in full force on Mother’s Day weekend.  Pushy little things.  Between taking care of the pneumonia patient, caring for the sick child and nursing myself (though mommies aren’t supposed to get sick, you know??????????????????)…I had the flighty little dive-bombers to contend with.  Luckily there was some of the 20 lb bag of sugar from last year left.

At any given time there’s 20 or 30 of them zipping around out there juking and jiving.  It’s quite a site to behold and definitely signals the beginning of summer.  I think we sort of skate quite quickly through spring and land in summer, even though officially summer doesn’t start til mid to late June.  

See, we have to start summer early, cause it goes WAY too fast here.

Though, it really is quite cool so far as compared to last year at this time.  We’ve had much more moisture (rain, hail, some snow in mid-May), so that’s part of it.  I’m hoping it won’t get as hot and dry as last year, but we’ll just have to see.

Down side of the moisture?????

Bugs.

Shortly after the arrival of the hummingbirds, we had an infestation of…shudder….flying ants.

I HATE those things.  I had to drag the pneumonia-afflicted man out of bed to deal with them.  I know, that sounds SOOOOOOO tacky, wussy, chickenshit.  But what can I say?  It’s sort of like the flying monkeys in Wizard of Oz.

Monkeys aren’t supposed to fly…that’s what makes them so scary.  Ants aren’t supposed to fly either.

And no, it’s not that I’m scared of them, per se.  I just can’t deal with them.  They make me squeamish…and I feel like my skin is crawling.  Yuck.

Now…it’s the ticks.  Just crawling around in the house.  In fact, at nap this afternoon, I found one crawling on Caroline.  For those of you who don’t know, Caroline is the American Girl doll who came to live with us in December.  She was napping with us today and ended up with an American Dog Tick jaunting along in her golden locks.  Lovely, just lovely.

Ticks rank up there with flying ants and monkeys.  They just aren’t right.

See the next post for the rest of the recent visitors to our humble abode here on the side of the mountain.

About madranchwife

Mother, Mad Ranchwife(as in--at times-- crazy, nutso, loco, off-my-rocker insane), Veterinarian, Physical Therapist, "Liberal, pinko, gay-loving, Subaru-driving Socialist" (as I've been called), proud to be a totally tree-huggin', climate change believin', granola girl environmentalist, ObamaGirl, Pro-Choice (don't even get me started here...), and in my younger days a feminist vegetarian as a result of time spent at CU Boulder (this lasted approximately 14 months, until all the Jimmy Buffett I was listening to caused me to crave a cheeseburger). Now I just get pleasure out of swimming against the stream and ruffling a few feathers here in the wild west state of Wyoming!
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